16 Aug 2002 whytheluckystiff   » (Master)

i'm finding myself in the same position as criswell these
days.  as i reach the age in which a young man is supposed
to be forming his own opinions about video stores, i often
find myself frozen in line as the other "members" in front of
me engage in the video store equivalent of road rage.  it's
happened three times in the last month.  what's interesting
to me is that some of my most competent and talented friends
have worked for video stores.  times are changing though.  and
no one will be able to stop the destruction that will follow.

last time i was in line at hollywood video and this guy with
a black eye was in front of me.  he had just come back from
a carribean cruise with his wife and he was pissed.  the lad
at the counter was a british kid with blue stuff around his
eyes.  powdery blue stuff.  black eyes and blue eyes. i just
realized that!  what is it with people at video stores and
their discolorations?

so Blacks Eye was fuming in line.  he had a Playstation game and
when he got to the desk, he started going off about how his
kids were crying the whole time he was on his trip because
the game was still locked.  i guess Blue Eyes had forgotten
to remove the plastic anti-theft strip for the game.

so Blue Eyes scans the game or something and then hands it
back to the guy, "there I gave you a free week."

"oh, a free week is all?" says Black Eyes, winding his hand.
i remember him winding his hand on his shorts, like winding
up for a punch, instinctively.  "what about two free weeks?"

"well, no," says Blue Eyes, "it's actually just one free
week you get, because that's what you paid for."

"oh but it's your mistake," said Black Eyes, "see you
should give the game for free for two weeks.  it's your

"but we've fixed the mistake," (Blue Eyes), "and given
you the free week."

"but it's too late for that now," and Black Eyes gets
this big grin on his face like he's going insane.  and
i can see him by now because they started walking over
by the doors.  i guess the worker was trying to help move
him out.  "yeah, my kids already cried over that game.
my trip's already over.  the kids already cried."

i was stuck there for fifteen minutes listening to this
little debate.  i mean they both had such good points 
and the children had cried all week.  hard to say.  i
don't know who i would have voted for.  (i mean if they
had a phone number where i could call in and vote for
Black or Blue.)  they fought all the way out the door
and into the street.  i had to find a worker in back to
check me out.

agg.  didn't mean to take up so much space.  i know i
shouldn't go on and on like this.  it's a terrible
habit.  then again, perhaps i'll buzz back through it
and post it up as a front page article.

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