23 Sep 2001 carl   » (Apprentice)

Man. I feel sick. I haven't been sleeping very well. Haven't been sleeping much at all actually and when I do it's at very strange hours...again. But today I feel really sick. My stomach is aching like a little bitch and my eyes are burning after I lit some incense.

Lots on my mind over the past few years. More than I can really try to put down here. Things like where to get a job, should I give college a try again, etc. Not sure if I even want to stay in this country. Not sure about how to teach myself some things I need to learn. However I am sure about a couple of things. I am sure that when someone doesn't know the same things I know I'll put a little extra effort into not rubbing that fact in. I know that I have just had one of the worst fights with my mother ever. I know that I have some serious problems, physically, that need to be addressed really soon. I know that there are a lot of problems in this world and not a whole lot is really being done about them. If I really tried I could probably generate a list the size of a encyclopedia of problems this world has.

Yeah so my mom thinks I have a porn addiction. My mom thinks I need to find "God" too so take that for what it's worth. My mom thinks a lot of things. My mom tries to be the mom of a little child probably because she wasn't really much of a mother when I was younger and was living with my father.

Knowing that this is really intended for developers and whatnot I shall keep this short. Maybe I will do something on my website some day. I don't know if I really care much about these things anymore. It seems there are far more pressing matters than whether or not I understand C.

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