20 Mar 2001 Arrow   » (Journeyer)

Feeling low...

Why should I care what anyone thinks?!

Seems I find this feature of Advo to be it's best.

I certainly don't expect anyone but myself to acually read this.

So here I am struggling with dependant libraries to add support for MNG to the Berlin server. Have to learn how to build a build system for some of this. But this on top of everything else is tough.

I get so discuraged sometimes.. One might ask why do any of it it if it makes you feel bad...But...It's really that I know what needs to be...what would be really cool...I always see the big picture clearly. But, my skills in making that happen seem so inadiquate.

Funny thing the social aspect of free software projects...

Some of these guys here are so amazing. Like stefan...He can code about as fast as he can think. I get so frustrated and intimidated tho. My own ineptitude....

Well...I don't feel to good about things...but damn it...I said *I'd* do it...and I am. So what if I spend hours and hours doing what someone else might take 30 minutes to do.

Reminds me of when I failed typing class in High School...Smartest fuckin kid in school...failed because I couldn't switch my brain off long enough to just see a letter and hit a key...:/

well I'm tired and need sleep....

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